05-22-2021

P.S. I think my confidence is almost to the point that next Saturday I will share my pictures without my short on from the beginning to current day. Not sure this is the type of vulnerable Brene Brown meant but I'm going to go for it! If I can inspire or help even just one other person, it will be worth it!!!

05-22-2021

This week the cravings were not there and the will power went up! Also, I'm recognizing good foods from bad...like looking at a dinner of someone else and determining what in it is fuel and what's not. Plus, I can visualize my portion sizes without using the scale (I'm still double checking just in case.) So, I feel even better than last week that I'm capable of handling more responsibility in phase 3. I did decide to add another 7 days to phase 2 as I'm still losing. I was a little bummed about not getting to add some foods and mix my veggies but it's one week and I've come this far! I'm still getting over this virus too so coughing a lot and congested...soups are still my favorite right now. However, the bbq chicken was so yummy too! Emotionally speaking, this week I've learned I'm somewhat of an enabler and thought I wasn't. As a result, I'm practicing mindfulness to discontinue that trait as my family, especially my daughter, needs me to. She has to gain her independence without a safety net! My husband is coming around to thinking about doing this with me in my second round. I've chosen the best recipes to cook for dinner this last week of phase 2 so he can join me and see if he can do it. I'm still not getting the support I need from him and continue to ask for it but he gets defensive instead. So I'm grateful to my PMB family for always being there when I need it! Could definitely not have done any of this without all the resources and support!!! ♥️

05-15-2021

This week I continue to want to eat things that I see that are definitely restricted. I stop and truly think about it and wonder why do I want to eat it? Am I hungry? Is it familiar? So this week has definitely been emotional still but I'm definitely also getting to the heart of myself and my brain process. Mindfulness was not a part of my health and it is definitely now so I'm seeing where the two are conflicting. I had more fun with recipes this week specifically the soups as I had a virus that turned into bronchitis and a sinus infection this week. I'm choosing to stick to the protocol and riding out the symptoms as opposed to taking the antibiotics and other meds prescribed to me. I'm letting my body repair itself. It's taking longer than I hoped but in the long run I think that will be a benefit. I actually felt myself shrinking this week and my tops are bigger and I'm wearing a couple of that I was too self-conscious to wear before. I'm feeling good even though I'm sick and I'm excited about my journey. My weight hasn't been as great as it was that first week but my inches are awesome! I'm down 21 lb with my 6 lb of fat loading and down 32 in! People are taking notice and commenting so I'm looking forward to this week's post on social media. I'm also looking forward to adding in some more foods next week. I've printed the recipes and have made a plan in my Google Calendar so that I continue doing things the way they're supposed to and continue getting healthier.

05-15-2021

Last week I didn't journal. It was a tough week. I was busy as my son graduated with honors with a major and double minor during a pandemic! My parents were here from South Carolina too...AND it was Mother's Day. Adding to this I had an emotional week. I realized making the new recipes that my old cooking methods were not healthy...even when I thought they were. I also struggled with wanting to eat restricted foods. My parents stayed with us for a week and the rest of them ate pizza, Chinese, and Mexican from my favorite places. I stuck to my course and as a result was able to get below 200 before my mom left--we cried. I'm grateful for that difficult but also awesome week as I'm learning more and more about myself and why I was overweight.

04-27-2021

Fat loading was definitely super hard but I managed to be up 6lbs! My first day of Phase 2 was great food-wise but I had indigestion, heartburn, bloated, stomach cramps, and a headache. Today was much better. I only had a mild headache for part of the day. However today it was more emotional. I've realized that food is very interwoven into my everyday life. Whenever there was a moment of peace I thought of gum or candy or a snack or Pepsi. But I just keep reminding myself why I'm doing this and I made it through my day. Getting my water intake has been fairly easy except as a teacher I'm finding it hard to go to the bathroom so much. I wasn't going to weigh myself until the end of the week but I chose to go ahead and do it tonight and I am down 7 lbs!! Bring it! I can do hard things!!!

04-24-2021

4/24/21: So, I began my fat loading yesterday and have eaten my breakfast today. I thought this would be the fun part, but eating so much high-fat food feels miserable. It's more food than I normally eat and so...much...butter. However, I'm so excited to get started on this journey and looking forward to the new me! "Trust the process" it will all be worth it!!!